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Ghostface Killah

Fans are fans. They will do what fans do. They will gush. (Sometimes they will grumble.)

Critics are critics. They will do what critics do. They will criticize. (Sometimes they will praise.)

All of which is to say that whatever you’ve heard about Scream 4 is absolutely true. It’s doesn’t matter what you’ve heard, it’s true. It’s true because someone felt it, thought it, wrote it, said it. That’s all it takes for truth to exist in the age of subjectivity where opinions are commodities and facts are proprietary.

So what will we say here about the fourth film in the Scream franchise? It was mildly entertaining. Far more funny than scary. Gorier than its predecessors. As cartoonish as any Wes Craven film has ever been. We suspect no one will mistake it for a classic.

Go see it if you want to. Or don’t. See it again if you insist. Or again after that. Whatever choice you make, Scream 4 probably won’t change your life. Save, maybe, for one monologue from the film’s denouement.

When we finally learn the identity of the killer(s) in Scream 4, we get Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson’s critique of Generation Y. If you haven’t seen the film, it is harsh. It appears to be justified. And, as of yet, it is without a rebuttal. Within that monologue are a number of lines that rise to the level of quotable. One in particular stands out for its naked narcissism: “I don’t need friends, I need fans.”

Many hands have been wrung over how much Generation Y loves itself. Some of those hands are the ones that changed their diapers. Other of those hands are the ones that bought them their first beer or taught them to drive. The age-old sport of one generation bemoaning the outcomes of their parental (or sibling) obligations has evolved to become a barroom brawl where Boomers throw chairs at Millennials who are busy smashing beer bottles against the heads of Xers who themselves are looking to land a sucker punch against whatever remains of the Greatest Generation. Culture is often messy. But not like this. Perhaps it is all to be expected when wealth feels as if it is utterly accessible and authorship lacks both tradition and hierarchy. Alas, we’re diverting a bit from the topic of the day.

It’s easy to decry Generation Y as self-absorbed and narcissistic. It’s even easier to blame their parents for breeding such behavior. And easier still to cite the rise of a hyper-mediated culture that demands all of us to become broadcasters as the inspiration for a generation’s egomania. That’s pretty much what Craven and Williamson (a Boomer and an Xer, respectively) did with the final monologue in Scream 4. With that line (“I don’t need friends, I need fans.”), they seemed to be issuing a challenge to the Millennials.

How would the generation under fire respond? Twitter can be a bottomless pit. It may not be the best place to find a thoughtful rebuttal, but you can count on some semblance of a conversation happening there. Predictably, the Scream 4-related Twitter posts have centered mostly on gushing, grumbling and guestimation for what could happen in the next Scream movie. Facebook and the blogosphere have been similarly absent of any fierce rebuke. So far.

If we understand narcissism, we know that those who practice it tend to be immune to criticism. They receive only external affirmations and brush off any idea or fact that contradicts their self-mythology. If the critique of Generation Y were to elicit a response, it would likely contain a nonchalant dismissal. Maybe the Millenial response already lives on some t-shirt. Like this one:


Can it all be so simple? T-shirts are pretty reliable sources, but maybe we should go out and poll a living, breathing Millennial. Which is what we did. Twice. If what is true to one person represents a version of the truth at large, then what is true to two people must be even truthier, no?

The first Generation Yer, a 21-year-old graphic design intern, argued that narcissism is an American tradition. Individual rights, she asserted, are a declaration made by our nation that we all intend to be highly self-involved. The second Millennial, an 18-year-old preparing to graduate high school, reported that she couldn’t imagine trying to survive without her friends. As for how she accepts criticism, the high schooler described the most important trait demonstrated by her best friend as “being available to help me better myself.” Maybe these kids aren’t so lost in themselves after all.

And maybe the reason not one of them has emerged to shout down Craven and Williamson is that they don’t really care what is said about them. They may not have the capacity for critique that their predecessors would want for them, but they’re not exactly hopeless.

Not yet.


LOOSELY RELATED RANT: I found it downright offensive that the term “ghostface killer” was used so freely in Scream 4 without any acknowledgment of the work of Dennis Coles. I don’t remember if that was true of the other three films, but that’s a pretty despicable omission. He slap-boxed with Jesus, son. Jesus.

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Somewhere in the comic universe, there is a Mason-Dixon Line (a Stark-Wayne Line?) that separates Marvel from DC. Fierce battles take place across that line. As you may guess, dear reader, this is…not…one of them.

You’ve heard about Iron Man 2, right? It’s, like, the biggest movie in the world. Right now. (But not of ever. Some other movie has that title.)

The Losers? Well…that one is…not so big.

Which is to say that this post has absolutely nothing to do with fair fights.

Iron Man 2 represents the Marvel camp. It is, of course, the sequel to Iron Man, a pretty classic book that has gone in and out of print and gave great inspiration to the Ghostface Killah (never gettin’ iller). The sequel stars Robert Downey, Jr., an Oscar winner, the guy who toplined Angel Heart [SPOILER], and the hottest woman on the planet*. It was released in early May and has earned north of $250 million in North America since its opening. There’s a strong likelihood that you’ve already seen it. 

The Losers represents the DC camp. It’s a really old school comic from WWII that has kinda been rebooted a couple of times and lacks a cool rapper to give it any credibility. It stars Nancy Botwin’s dead husband, Stringer Bell [SPOILER], the guy who is about to play Captain America, Michael from The Lost Boys [RIP] and the hottest woman on another planet*. It was released in late April and has earned south of $25 million in North America since its opening. There’s a strong likelihood that you hated having to watch so many commercials for it during the closing weeks of the NBA regular season.

The tale of the tape is pretty obvious, huh? This match-up was a bit like asking a clementine to battle a Red Delicious apple. If the NBA play-offs hadn’t taken a couple of days off, it may never have happened. But they did. So it did. When I bought one ticket and watched both films a couple of nights ago.

Iron Man 2 is very six-y. That dude Dustin said so. I’m inclined to agree. To a degree. Any time you plop down to watch a movie that has the number 2 in its title, you can only really expect one thing: it’s gonna try to make another boatload of money based on all of the cool things that happened in the movie that preceded it. Hollywood is a business. No one has gone too far to see that. Iron Man 2 is an exercise in cool. And it works. Mostly.

I cannot say the same about The Losers. It’s also an exercise in cool. But it doesn’t work. Whereas Iron Man 2 made a sincere attempt to develop or expand a narrative, The Losers was just a collection of scenes where some kinda cool shit happened that involved some people who were trying to act cool, but the story didn’t tie together at all. It’s a popcorn movie that forgot to bring the butter. And the salt. Which is not necessarily a fail. But is really, really, really far from success.

To be perfectly frank, the best thing I can say about The Losers is that it provided an opportunity to see a trailer for this movie. Which looks like it could be the popcorn-iest movie of all time. Which ought to be a very cool thing. As long as the butter helps it all congeal properly.

WINNER: Iron Man 2.

LOSER: Screenwriter for The Losers.

*Denotes that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And you should probably go on ahead and behold that.

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